Trimester One.

10:00:00 AM

It was 4 weeks pregnancy when we found out. Until 6 weeks everything went okay, I ate a lot nutritious food and drink, I was strong and worked like I used to. But as I marked 7 weeks pregnant.. morning sickness changes everything. 

Every…every problem that happen in my trimester one comes down to one reason which is…I cant eat. I felt so nauseated in facing almost every food. I couldn’t stand eating rice too much, I hated the smell of beef or onions, I couldn’t eating more than two slice of fruit without puking. Sometimes I puked even without reason. Really, eating time felt like hell.

I survived by only drinking juice, and eating anything as long as my stomach wasn’t empty. Tho I say anything, we didn’t really meant it since we choose everything in the most healthy way. Trimester one is the basic baby development, we don’t wanna screw it up by eating rubbish. So we ordered healthy pregnancy catering which cost us a lot and it ended up in trash. We went searching any food which is titled healthy and ended up in my husband’s belly.

I lost almost 10 pounds. I was so skinny, baby bump hadn’t show up. So rather than look like a pregnant woman, I look more like…bulimics.

From one thing above, everything else came up. I felt dizzy and weak, I put my digestion in so much trouble which is too nasty to be told. I went to the doctor almost every weeks until 13 weeks, that’s how bad my trimester one goes. 

As a worker, specially as a front liner, this also cause me trouble. 

Office drama like never before. On my worst condition like I told you before, who on earth though that I can work normally? Of course I skipped a lot. And it felt so hurt knowing people don’t always WANT to understand. They called me spoiled, they said I made it up, they said…bad things about me not going to work. 

I really felt like on the most desperate moment of my life. I was so scared of my baby’s condition-put aside my own and my job circle didn’t support me to at home and enjoying my salary cuts. Like…God, really?

One day..on my-I don’t know-times to see the doc, I cried telling him that I was so stressed about everything. Alhamdulillah, I met a good doctor named Dr. Eddy who can strengthen me. He told me my baby was okay, but if until next week my eating habits didn’t getting better. I better stay at the hospital to be taken care of. And for my work, he wrote a letter explaining my health problem and a recommendation in medic opinion to put me in a less busy position.

And when my head office read the letter, the work drama wasn’t over. He was so kind that he took a very fast action upon the letter- unlike my direct boss. He told me to be a secretary for a while as he talked to the other head division. And what happen? Those buzzing sound keep on talking. They told me that I was a bootlicker ! 

Its like…all this time I worked as hard as I can. But once I failed to do it. Its like I never worked good at all. I cried every once and then, asking my husband, the best listener ever, what’s wrong with me? I worked two years more before this pregnancy and managed to do it good. I put 100% on the works that most worker in my office avoids. Why still judged me? Is it because now they have to handle my jobs? But for God sake, what’s wrong with them for like having no sympathy toward the pregnant?

I actually don’t wanna write it this clear, but I guess you guys need to read this. If you or your wife or your what-so-ever didn’t make a sweat on being pregnant, doesn’t mean that there’s no one struggle on it. Sometimes the very least thing you could do to the pregnant is by having no bad though about her. 

Fast forward, I moved to PDI, a section which re-input all those SPT you sent. I couldn’t be more thankful since here, in this division..everyone is so good to me and support my pregnancy.
The end of trimester one taught me so much. 

It taught me how unlimited my parents love is, it taught me how patient and how good my husband really is, it showed me who a real friend is and it proved me matter what happen, people will talks. Better not putting those buzzing sound into deep thought. Flying solo !

Health corner : 

Food :  Avoid seafood, specially clam, everything must be cooked well- including veggies (unless you clean it your self), I stopped consuming mayonnaise unless I know its pasteurized, no coffee, indomie, durian and coconut. 

Beauty product : take a look of what inside those pretty bottle. I stop chemical facial skincare and used skii instead. Used natural based lotion, I used Corine de Farme and Body shop. Make sure you consulted to your Obstetricians before applying anything. When acne appear I almost put my usual acne gel which turn out not so safe for pregnancy. 

Travel advice : no advice but…stay where you are. Don’t go anywhere before asking your doctor. And since I often get dizzy, we hire a driver so I could just sit calmly in the backseat. Well baby, for you...we really do everything to make sure you’re safe. 

Looking back to how my trimester one goes, I feel extremely grateful that Im still alive. Hahaha True! Always said it since I feel it was so hard to be passed thru. The only thing that strengthen me is that…every time I went to doctor, he always said “your baby is okay, he’s healthy”. 

I know, im carrying a fighter. 

* i rearrange the timeline, this post originally written at february, 29th 2016*

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  1. ohmaigosh, it's terrible reading ur post. i felt the same in my first pregnancy,but it had happened when we're not working yet. So happy now comes ur baby boy saying haii mom, im a real fighter coz u two fight for me :) congratz !

    1. hihihihihi
      and now its time for you to fight again !!!
      Semangat afril semangaaaaaaat >_<

  2. Hello my name is ayu. Saya orang sunda juga loh teh. Seneng banget baca dairy teteh. Ditunggu update nyaaa. Kebetulan saya juga baru menikah sebulan jadi excited baca pengalaman-pengalaman teteh. And congratulation for your first baby !!

    1. hwwaaa makasih yaaaa :)
      selamat menempuh hidup baru ya !


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